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I WON...I WON

June 4th 2009 09:55
It must be great to be born beautiful. But for all of us that were not blessed with a face to stop men breathing, and the rest of us that need to wear a shroud from the neck down, I may have found your chance to shine. There are quests out there girls, quests for the the unusual, quests for the fat and quests for the unwanted. Here is your chance to show those boys who woofed at you as you walked down the street and the popular girls that took up a collection for your plastic surgery that you are beautiful just as you are.
The first is THE MISS JUMBO pageant, now this is right down my alley girls. It is held in Thailand as part of their Jumbo Banquet Elephant Feast (whatever that is) and the lucky chubby that wins is selected on her ability to represent the best characteristics of an elephant, how charming !!


How appropriate that a country known for crime (especially drug trafficking) should have a beauty contest for jail inmates, maybe it's because most of the population lives there. The Buen Pastor Prison conducts an annual beauty pageant and the lucky crim wins new clothes and a crown but no time off for good behaviour.

The next one is a beauty, it's a serious contest but it struck me as slightly creepy when I read about it. And when I read what first prize was I have to admit I laughed (I probably shouldn't have but I just can't help myself sometimes).

It is THE MISS LANDMINE quest, a beauty pageant for women who have been injured by landmines in Angola and celebrates pride and empowerment over physical beauty, which is a nice thought.................but first prize is...............a leg.

China came up with a novel idea after a contestant was banned for having plastic surgery. THE MISS ARTIFICIAL BEAUTY CONTEST. The contestants had be aged anywhere from 18 to 62 and had to produce a doctors certificate proving they had gone under the knife. Not sure what the prizes consisted of but I'm guessing a week with Michael Jackson.

Only in America would a beauty contest be held in honour of a TV show. THE MISS KLINGON EMPIRE contest is held every year in Atlanta in the midst of A Trekkie convention. This contest must be a bonanza for men that crave extra body hair in weird places, pointed ears and strange body parts.
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Comments
2 Comments. [ Add A Comment ]

Comment by Morgan Bell

June 4th 2009 10:30
Miss Landmine . . . thats kind of cool actually, at least they are owning their disability and being recognised for it

Comment by Wilson Pon

June 4th 2009 10:47
Honestly, I heard many bizarre beauty pageants before, such as the skinniest Miss Pageant, where the ladies are being judged based on the skinniest body size! @-@

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