the world of gayeMY BODY IS A WONDERLAND ......
June 21st 2008 04:07
While watching morning T.V. today it was reported that Australians are now regarded as the fattest in the world. I’m so proud ! And so I proceeded to ponder the benefits of being among the ranks of the fat while drinking my coffee with three sugars and two chocolate muffins, and this is what I came up with.
1. I can reserve a seat for a friend because my arse takes up two seats.
2. If it’s a freezing cold day there are numerous places on my body to warm my hands.
3. I don’t need contraception, I just rip my clothes off in front of a man and they scream
and run......
4. I don’t need to lay out hard earned money for a trampoline, I just lay on the floor and
kids can use me..
5. I don’t need elastic around the top of my socks, I just tuck them into my ankles.
6. If there is a fire in he kitchen we don’t need a fire blanket, we can just use one
of my tent dresses, one whack of those big buggers and the fire's out !
7. My boobs are fantastic. I will never need surgery to keep them perky because the
roll of fat underneath them holds them up.
8. I’m good for the economy, when I walk into a restaurant they are delighted to see
me, they know they have just sold a three course meal.
9. If I take a tumble I am safe in the knowledge that I will bounce, therefore insuring
minimum amount of damage.
10. You’ll never see me struggling with numerous parcels and carry bags, when it all
becomes to much I can carry three items underneath my chin.
So you see there are benefits to belonging to the Army of the Fat !!!
1. I can reserve a seat for a friend because my arse takes up two seats.
2. If it’s a freezing cold day there are numerous places on my body to warm my hands.
3. I don’t need contraception, I just rip my clothes off in front of a man and they scream
and run......
4. I don’t need to lay out hard earned money for a trampoline, I just lay on the floor and
kids can use me..
5. I don’t need elastic around the top of my socks, I just tuck them into my ankles.
6. If there is a fire in he kitchen we don’t need a fire blanket, we can just use one
of my tent dresses, one whack of those big buggers and the fire's out !
7. My boobs are fantastic. I will never need surgery to keep them perky because the
roll of fat underneath them holds them up.
8. I’m good for the economy, when I walk into a restaurant they are delighted to see
me, they know they have just sold a three course meal.
9. If I take a tumble I am safe in the knowledge that I will bounce, therefore insuring
minimum amount of damage.
10. You’ll never see me struggling with numerous parcels and carry bags, when it all
becomes to much I can carry three items underneath my chin.
So you see there are benefits to belonging to the Army of the Fat !!!
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Comment by Morgan Bell
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roll of fat underneath them holds them up.
haha i think this is the reason most women who are overweight justify not losing it . . . its all about the boobs!
Comment by Tracy
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