the world of gayeTHE MISSING LINKS AND HOW TO SPOT THEM
May 28th 2009 07:02
Last week on the news there was great excitement over a fossil that was found and because many poeple think it may be the "missing link". Well have I got news for them!! I found the "missing link" years ago, in fact there are whole communities of them. They live all around the fringes of "real" humans and they are breeding at a scary rate because they think fertilizing an egg only applies to their pet chickens.
I am talking about the "rednecks", the "hobos" and all the other undeveloped brain stems walking the earth.
There are signs my friends, and if you are aware of them you can spot them in the crowd. I think maybe the combined Governments of the world need to get together and have a "think tank" on why evolution has stood still for these hybrids and how we can help them.
From birth there are certain characteristics to look out for........
Defective people attract each other. If you see a wedding taking place and the bride is pregnant and smoking and wearing thongs on her feet, the groom is missing a tooth or two and has a vicious dog as his best man, chances are these two are some of the "missing link".
A pregnant defective will stand out from the rest because of the tattoos on her stomach. She will be very proud of her markings and lift her tank top at any opportunity to show her growing "missing link".
There are also great differences in our child rearing practices. Defectives have their own version of nannies for those that have to work and support the other 50 members of their families.
Of course there are all the cultural things about the "missing links" that they must pass on to their little links to make sure their breed survives. One is the Mullet. All Hybrids have a mullet and this is practiced from a very early age right though to the death of a defective.
There is the normal everyday Mullet but they have very special "missing link" stylists for those special occasions such as drinking competitions and boot scooting nights.
And then there is the "sexy" Mullet that all good mothers will make sure their 13 year old defective teenage girls have in order to attract a mate.
There are also the social skills of a Mullet head to be passed on to the next generation. Things like the etiquette of drinking in public and how not to vomit on yourself when pissed.
You can also tell a "missing link" from the environment they inhabit. The "trailer trash" home is what the defectives know as architecture and if you sneak a look over the back fence there will be a dead giveaway that a family of Mullets live there. Yes it will be the "missing link" version of a swimming pool.
Of course there are many many disturbing signs to look out for in our quest to drag the "missing links" into the modern world and they need our help. So next time you see a mullet mummy in the book shop about to buy her very own redneck version of Dora for her little mullet help her out will you.
If we all pull together maybe we can really do some good and persuade them to cut their hair, cover up the tatts and get some dentures. Well....we can only try.
I am talking about the "rednecks", the "hobos" and all the other undeveloped brain stems walking the earth.
There are signs my friends, and if you are aware of them you can spot them in the crowd. I think maybe the combined Governments of the world need to get together and have a "think tank" on why evolution has stood still for these hybrids and how we can help them.
Defective people attract each other. If you see a wedding taking place and the bride is pregnant and smoking and wearing thongs on her feet, the groom is missing a tooth or two and has a vicious dog as his best man, chances are these two are some of the "missing link".
A pregnant defective will stand out from the rest because of the tattoos on her stomach. She will be very proud of her markings and lift her tank top at any opportunity to show her growing "missing link".
Of course there are all the cultural things about the "missing links" that they must pass on to their little links to make sure their breed survives. One is the Mullet. All Hybrids have a mullet and this is practiced from a very early age right though to the death of a defective.
There is the normal everyday Mullet but they have very special "missing link" stylists for those special occasions such as drinking competitions and boot scooting nights.
And then there is the "sexy" Mullet that all good mothers will make sure their 13 year old defective teenage girls have in order to attract a mate.
There are also the social skills of a Mullet head to be passed on to the next generation. Things like the etiquette of drinking in public and how not to vomit on yourself when pissed.
You can also tell a "missing link" from the environment they inhabit. The "trailer trash" home is what the defectives know as architecture and if you sneak a look over the back fence there will be a dead giveaway that a family of Mullets live there. Yes it will be the "missing link" version of a swimming pool.
Of course there are many many disturbing signs to look out for in our quest to drag the "missing links" into the modern world and they need our help. So next time you see a mullet mummy in the book shop about to buy her very own redneck version of Dora for her little mullet help her out will you.
If we all pull together maybe we can really do some good and persuade them to cut their hair, cover up the tatts and get some dentures. Well....we can only try.
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ps: the smoking, thong-clad, pregnant bride is a classic